The Primary Presentaion

 I love playing the piano. Something about sitting at the piano and playing songs, mostly songs that testify of the Savior, calms me and comforts me. I love learning new songs, but it takes me a good while to learn. Sight reading has never really been a strong suit. However, I have never been good at nor do I enjoy playing in front of an audience or accompanying other people. So when I received my new calling at church as the primary pianist for our ward, I was terrified. This calling included everything I loved AND everything I didn't love. Each week, I have a list of 3-5 songs to play as the Chorister and primary children sing along. Sometimes I know the songs already (which is nice) but sometimes I have to learn new songs during the week and then accompany the children on Sunday. Earlier in the year we sat down to plan the songs for the primary presentation that is held annually. As the year has gone on, I have done pretty good with learning our weekly songs. I of course made mistakes OFTEN. but we made it through the week and I would turn my attention to learning the songs for the next Sunday. During all of this, the primary presentation was in the back of my mind. How would I be able to play ten songs in front of HUNDREDS of people? Because it terrified me, I would usually push the thought away and think of something else. 

But before I knew it, the annual primary presentation was here. I knew all the songs. I had played and practiced them for MONTHS. But, Satan intruded my thoughts and I was just certain it was going to be awful. I convinced myself, I would not be able to play the songs for the program. I was going to black out,  lose my place, forget everything I know about the piano. I was going to be embarrassed and disappointed and I could not get those thoughts out of my mind. I prayed and prayed and prayed for peace, comfort, and whatever help the Lord was willing to give me. But I wasn't feeling strengthened. I wasn't feeling confident. I was full of anxiety and stress. 

We got to church, sat down, sang the opening song, listened to the opening prayer (given by Abbigail), heard some ward business, participated in the ordinance of the Sacrament, and then it was go time. Very hesitantly, I walked up to the piano. My nerves did not go away. My anxiety did not go away, at least not completely. But as I played, I felt strengthened. I did not lose my place on the page. I did not forget how to play the piano. I played all ten songs and I played them well. Before I knew it the presentation was over. I had conquered what had seemed like my worst fear. My prayers had been answered. 

When Drew was called as Bishop over two years ago now, A scripture came to mind that I laminated and it has been hanging on our refrigerator ever since, Doctrine & Covenants 84:88, "I will be on your right hand and on your left, and my spirit shall be in your hearts, and mine angels round about you, to bear you up." This scripture had come to pass that day. The lord was literally on my right hand and my left hand as I played that piano and His spirit was in my heart and His angels did bear me up. 

I know that the Lord knows me. He loves me. He is aware of me. I know He answered my prayers that day and aided me as I played the piano.