Friday, October 18, 2013

Real Life.

Okay, I'm going to be honest. I intentionally try to stay positive and post about happy things on this blog because those are the things I want to remember. But ALL OF US have weak moments. We all have days that are discouraging and seem like too much to handle! Right?!? 
Yesterday was a pretty good day. Abbigail was in a fairly good mood and things were going good. I even made cookies and did some dishes! I was feeling accomplished. We took some cookies over to Great Grandma Wright and played in the leaves at her house! We had fun. But after we got home, a switch went off in my head and the exhaustion hit. Seriously, my feet were hurting, my head was aching and all I wanted to do was get comfortable and go lay in bed. I was exhausted. {period}

But then I looked around and saw reality. Drew wasn't home from work yet, dinner was half way done, dirty dishes were COVERING my counters and my table, banana was stuck to my foot (thanks Abbi), Abbigail was opening every cabinet in the kitchen pulling out pots and pans, spaghetti noodles, hot chocolate mix, oatmeal or sandwich bags and if she wasn't doing that she was pulling out all of the trash on our garbage can and spreading it all over the floor. Just before I lost it, Drew walked through the door. 

He took Abbi for me and I finished dinner. Before we ate, I told him I was going to run to the gas station and get myself a Diet Coke. Finally, five whole minutes of silence by myself! It was nice. I got home, we fed Abbi and then put her to bed. (we had a late dinner, so it was past bedtime.) Then Drew and I sat down to eat. It felt nice to not worry about Abbi crying or yelling at me. It was just me and Drew, my feet were up, we were eating dinner and I had my Diet Coke. I was starting to feel better. Then, I went to take a sip of my drink, the lid came off and the full 32oz of Diet Coke spilled all over my pants and our carpet. 

I couldn't do anything but cry...

Drew quickly told me to go change, he cleaned up the spilled pop and then left to go get me a new one. {He's kinda the best}

This may sound trivial to a lot of you. You're thinking, "crying over spilled pop?" But I can tell you, it felt like SO much more than that. 

I can't even express how grateful I am that God cares about me and all of his children. Even through the hardest and most exhausting of days, He is still there and He still cares. I am not alone; I always have help. Being reminded of this gives me peace, hope and helps me feel refreshed. Because I can pray to Heavenly Father for help and read scriptures and other inspiring material I feel like I can do it. 

I truly am grateful to be a mother. It is really hard most days, but at the same time it is even more rewarding. I love watching Abbigail grow. I love hearing her talk, learn new words, discover new things. I just love her. Being a mother is what I have always dreamed of being. Even on the worst days, I wouldn't want to be doing anything else. 

"Do the best you can through these years, but whatever else you do, cherish that role that is so uniquely yours and for which heaven itself sends angels to watch over you and your little ones."

               -Jeffrey R. Holland

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